Caliente Pocket!

Jim Gaffigan is finally coming to Richmond in July. Yay!!!

$40 PLUS the standard Ticketmaster ass-raping? Boo!!!

One more piece of kitsch and I'll be John Waters

A couple of items that my Mom brought back from my Grandparents' house and gave to me:



My Grandpa's Shriners fez. Unfortunately, it's a bit too small for my big head. Actually, for friends around me in public, maybe that's a good thing. I wonder if he ever drove one of those tiny cars; I only ever saw him drive OldsmoBuicks.



"Too Much Tequila" by Xavier Cugat. I remember this painting fondly from my childhood, as it hung in one of my Grandparents' extra bedrooms (well before they redecorated their house). It looks to be an original by the Desi Arnaz mentor and husband of Charo, but the painting also shows up in this guy's collection. A Google search turned up this blog post musing on the multiple copies of one of Cugat's other paintings. So, I'm not sure what the deal is.

(Re)Evaluation: "The Blair Witch Project" & "Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2"

I originally saw The Blair Witch Project when it first arrived on DVD and I was less than impressed. My gripes with the movie:

1) The shaky cam: While the format of the movie necessitates the use of handheld cameras, the shakiness was a bit much. It was like watching my childhood home movies when my brother took over the reigns (see, he'd zip the camcorder around quickly on purpose).

2) The characters: I found all three leads to be really annoying. In order for one to root for a character, one must admire, identify with, or sympathize with him. But I didn't care for any of these bickering idiots (even when they weren't arguing). Plus, they were pretty dumb. Even if you are extremely frustrated with your fellow hikers, would you kick the group's only map of the area into the river? Didn't think so.

3) The lazy improv: I have no problem with profanity. A well-placed fuck can be very effective. But the overuse of foul language here, where the dialogue was all made up, just seemed like they couldn't think of anything else to say (see also Hill, Jonah).

4) The hype: I'm a wuss when it comes to horror movies. It doesn't take much to make me jump. "Scary as hell" read the The Blair Witch Project's one sheet. Not at all. Two scenes gave me the creeps: the one with the "children" laughing and screwing with the tent and the end in the house. Other than that, it was about 85 minutes of...nothing. And it's not that I'm a gorehound (aside from zombie movies), either. I very much prefer my scares to come from the atmosphere that the movie builds. This one just didn't deliver the goods.

I thought the marketing via its website, back story, and word of mouth was genius, though. It effectively used viral marketing before there was such a thing. Also, I thought that the pseudo doc "Curse of the Blair Witch" that aired on the Sci-Fi Channel (and is included on the DVD) was way more enjoyable than what it was created to promote.

Last week, though, I read an analysis of the movie and figured that I'd give it another chance to see if I could appreciate more now that some time has passed. Since I couldn't watch it with an audience in the theater, I figured that I should view it under the second most optimal conditions: middle of the night, lights off, sound cranked. Unfortunately, I wanted to get to it sooner rather than later, as I was borrowing a copy of the movie from a friend, and last night was a "school night", so a dark, rainy evening had to do. I fixed some comfort food (toasted cheese sandwich and tomato soup) for dinner and pressed play.

I still didn't think it was all that great, but it was better than I had remembered. There must be some correlation between the time removed from the hype behind a work and an increase in an ability to appreciate said work. Kind of like how I refused to listen to the Dave Matthews Band until I was well out of college. Then one day I bought Under the Table and Dreaming and, far away from the blind adoration of "Dave" (oh, how I would loathe the people that referred to him by his first name), I actually enjoyed the album. Anyway, although my attitude regarding the four points above remains unchanged, I at least like the movie a little bit better now. I don't know if I'd watch it again, though.

Now, the Skinemax spoof The Bare Wench Project...there's a movie that got it right the first time.

My friend also let me borrow Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2. Unlike the original, this film lived up to its reputation. What a mess. I'm trying to think of something positive to say about the film, but I'm drawing a blank. The acting, dialogue, and direction were all sub par. But all of those failings could be overlooked if it was scary. But, like its predecessor, it wasn't. Therefore, the movie simply didn't work. It certainly wasn't the worst horror film ever (as Internet hyperbole would have you believe), but it didn't have much going for it, either. You can safely avoid this one.

Note: I don't know if I'll make the re-examining of movies that I didn't like (and their sequels that I never bothered to watch) a semi-regular feature. Input?

"Letter From God To Man"

It's like C.S. Lewis throwing down beat poetry over an electronic music backing. The video's pretty simple, but there are some interesting points made. (For another fan video of the song, click here, though I question some of the imagery used.)

Credit due: the Bored-Again Christian podcast for exposing me to the song

30 Rock tumbler

Tonight's episode of "30 Rock": "Succession"

After Jack finds out he will be named the new GE chairman, he elects Liz to be his successor.

Discuss.

Office chatter

Tonight's episode of "The Office": "Night Out"

Michael and Dwight surprise Ryan in New York for a guys' night out of clubbing.

Discuss.

Crush of the Week: Kate Bosworth

This week's Crush is actress Kate Bosworth. I saw her in 21 this week and, acting ability aside, she was awfully pretty.



But I used to have a free subscription to Star magazine and I've seen the paparazzi photos: it wouldn't kill her to get extra cheese on her Whopper.

Today I go green

Morning beverage #1:



Morning beverage #2: coffee with Irish cream sizzurp.

Shoes I'm wearing today:



I'm doing my part. Are you?

EDIT: I am also listening to these today:

Give a hoot. Do a shot.

I snapped this pic of a homemade sign posted at a park in Chuch Hill.

My Southern Dandification has entered the next level

A month or two ago I was extremely close to getting something that I've been wanting for ages: a seersucker suit. Unfortunately, this particular men's clothier I was going to get it from offered such a deal that they were all sold out by the time I made up my mind to make a purchase. So I settled on a pair of seersucker pants from Old Navy. I wore them last weekend for UR's reunion picnic and revelled in the knowledge that I was 5 degrees cooler than everyone else (or at least my lower half was).

Unfortunately, I was not sipping on a mint julep at the time.

30 Rock tumbler

Tonight's episode of "30 Rock": "Subway Hero"

Liz's old boyfriend, Dennis returns and is determined to win her back!

Discuss.

Office chatter

Tonight's episode of "The Office": "Chair Model"

Michael begins a fascination with a woman modeling a chair in an office supply catalog while Kevin and Andy are determined to win back stolen parking spaces.

Discuss.

Crush of the Week: Natalie from "Big Brother 9"

This week's Crush is reality show contestant/bikini barista Natalie from "Big Brother 9." Okay, admittedly, I'm phoning my selection in this week, but I know that at least a couple of MW readers will get a kick out of this.



For some reason, the local CBS affiliate abrubtly cut to a Hummer dealership commercial right after her eviction last night, which was pretty funny considering her nocturnal shenanigans.

Why do I know this crap? Thanks a lot, spydrz.

All these years I've been overpaying for sex.

That's it. I'm moving to Montana. Bargains galore!

"Honest to blog."

That line almost makes me not want to see Juno.

Disturbing celebrity trend of the week

Pictures of a glasses-free Tina Fey. I got this week's issue of Entertainment Weekly in the mail this weekend and the cover, as well as the story's pictures feature Fey without her specs. And she ditched her glasses for the duration of last week's "30 Rock." Sure, she's a lovely woman without her signature accessory, but why can't Fey continue to cater to my fetish? C'MON!

Or I just could've said, "I walked on the moon."

I had been dreading this past weekend's 10 year college reunion for some time, mainly because I didn't want to have to repeatedly answer "What are you doing now?" questions. Well, with a little help from some friends in town for the festivities, I brainstormed a good backstory that would be interesting enough to be somewhat impressive (or, at least, not as depressing as my current state of wasted potential), yet not so out there as to be unbelievable. Mostly. There are a few nuggets of truth underneath the piles of exaggeration and outright lies.

My tight-knit circle of good friends at school was pretty insular and there were only a handful of folks outside of that group that I hung out or associated with much. But those people didn't show up at the reunion and I pretty much hung back at the weekend's events. So I never got to try out my lie. Here is what we came up with:

"So, what do you do?"

"I did the political thing in DC until I got burned out and went to law school. But I didn't really have the zeal that my classmates had, so I didn't really choose to go into the legal field after graduation. Nowadays I spend my time doing some freelance writing. Nothing huge - mostly pop culture stuff for web sites like PopMatters, Relevant, and the late Stylus, among other smaller sites and entertainment blogs. Music, TV, and movie reviews and stuff like that. I've done a few magazine pieces here and there. It's not much, but it pays the bills."

"Are you married?"

"Well, I was. My wife passed away. She got an IUD and died in a car crash. In Iraq. During childbirth. I'm a stay at home dad now."

Okay, that last part is ridiculous and I wouldn't have said that. When throwing out ideas, Shamrock misspoke about my "wife's" cause of death and meant to say IED, but this was funnier. If things don't pan out in the next few years, I'll at least have something to use at the 15 year reunion.

Also, note to the Reunion Committee: in the future, please provide "divorced/frustradedly still single" designations on people's nametags. It'd make my job that more efficient.

Earl Weaver in "The Best Baseball Interview Ever"

The audio of this interview with the legendary Orioles manager is hilarious enough on its own; the animation just puts a cherry (tomato) on top. My favorite part is the parade of meat behind Earl towards the end.

Due to colorful language, this video is very NSFW. Just so's you know.

This video is kind of old and has no doubt made the rounds several times, but it's new to me.

Reunion, Shmeunion

I swear, just thinking about the barrage of people asking me "so, what are you doing now?" this weekend has me curled up in the fetal position in the corner of my cube.

30 Rock tumbler

Tonight's episode of "30 Rock": "MILF Island"

Jack, riding high on the success of a new reality show, "MILF Island," is blindsided by a newspaper item revealing disparaging comments one of his employees made.

Discuss.

Office chatter

Tonight's episode of "The Office": "Dinner Party"

Pam and Jim find they have run out of excuses and are forced to go to Jan and Michael's house for dinner. When Andy and Angela are also invited to dinner, Dwight's jealousy gets the best of him.

Discuss.

Crush of the Week: Alicia Witt

This week's Crush is actress Alicia Witt. I was flipping channels the other day and saw that she is now a part of the cast of "Law & Order: Criminal Intent."



And, according to her Wikipedia entry, when she was five she recited Romeo & Juliet on "That's Incredible!" How cool is that?

Nasty.

This past weekend I tried International Delight Cinnamon Caramel Custard coffee creamer and it's disgusting. Thinking my initial experience may have been a fluke, I gave it another shot. Ugh. Gross. No wonder Food Lion had it marked down to $1.

In other coffee news, this morning a co-worker gave me a couple of vouchers for Starbucks' new Pike Place coffee. The free cups are valid only on Wednesdays, which puts me in a pickle. Usually, coffee is my "weekend treat", but I'm not adverse to drinking it during the week. But there aren't any convenient Starbucks to stop at on the way to work and I'm not going to go out on my lunch break because caffeine really affects me and I try to limit my consumption of it after noon. I guess my best option is to have an after-work cup of decaf, if they offer it.

Micah World Top 25

Here they are, the top 25 songs burning up my iPod (as of 4.08.08):

1. "Serve Me My Food" - Steve Poltz
2. "This Is For Real" - Motion City Soundtrack
3. "Rains" - Steve Poltz
4. "Street Fighters Face" - Steve Poltz
5. Cape Cod Kwassa Kwassa" - Vampire Weekend
6. "The Temptation of Adam" - Josh Ritter
7. "Open Doors" - Josh Ritter
8. "California Girls" - The Magnetic Fields
9. "What Would Ghandi Do?" - Steve Poltz
10. "Haters' Union" - Steve Poltz
11. "Brief History Of My Life" - Steve Poltz
12. "Oxford Comma" - Vampire Weekend
13. "A-Punk" - Vampire Weekend
14. "Head Over Feet" - Alanis Morissette
15. "Starman" - Dewey Cox
16. "Falling Slowly" - Glen Hansard & Market Irglova
17. "One On One" - Hall & Oates
18. "My Guitar" - Jump, Little Children
19. "Dead End Street" - The Kinks
20. "Why Don't You Get A Job" - The Offspring
21. "Money Back Guarantee" - Pigeon John
22. "Man-Sized Wreath" - R.E.M.
23. "Me In Honey" - R.E.M.
24. "Sentimental Heart" - She & Him
25. "Why Do You Let Me Stay Here?" - She & Him

Lots of changes since the last chart, as this is the first one since I got a new iPod in January and the playcounts were reset. Yes, I like that new Steve Poltz album.

How's that for a slice of fried gold?

Simon Pegg and Edgar Wright confirmed that they'll be making a third movie together, which will be titled The World's End. No plot details were divulged except that the flavor of Cornetto in the new film will be mint chocolate chip.

In the meantime, those "Spaced" DVDs can't hit Stateside fast enough (but we'll have to wait until July).

Requiem for an advocate against damn dirty apes

R.I.P. Charlton Heston, 1924-2008.



Somehow, it's fitting that you're chilling with Moses, Jesus, et al. right now. I'm sure Michael Moore is tap dancing on your grave as I type.

Kudos to me for avoiding an obvious "cold, dead hands" joke.

Office chatter

It's confirmed: come February 2009, NBC will air a spin-off of "The Office." I'm torn about this news. Even though some people hated the hour-long episodes, I was always of the mindset that there was no such thing as too much "Office." But I fear that they may be spreading themselves a bit too thin with two shows.

I'm curious as to who (and where) this spin-off will revolve around. I'd hate to see the Scranton branch split up for the sake of having two shows. But if the new show centers around Karen in the Utica branch or Ryan at corporate headquarters, then that may work. We'll just have to wait and see.

Also of note in NBC's announcement is that "Scrubs" is not on the '08-'09 schedule, so I assume that the rumors of the show's move to ABC are true. Hooray!

Go, Bucks! (again)

Go, Bucks!

Here's hoping the Buckeyes can advance to the finals of the Not Invited Tournament tonight.

As for the big tournament...four #1 seeds left? Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Of course, I'll still watch, but give me a Cinderella; someone to root for. Guess I'll just have to focus my energies on hating UNC.

I thought this plague was over

As I was getting ready for work yesterday morning, some frightening news broke: Kathie Lee Gifford is joining "Today." NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! I wish this was an April Fool's Day joke, but it is not.

Finally, daily status reports about Cody will resume.