30 Rock tumbler

Tonight's episode of "30 Rock": "Cougars"

Jack takes a special interest in an inner-city Little League team from the worst neighborhood in New York; a new, young employee asks Liz to a gallery opening.

Discuss.

Note: During the absence of "The Office" I have decided to do a regular weekly post for the second best comedy on the air (for the time being).

I never thought it was such a bad little tree.

Maybe it just needs a little love.

When it comes to my cube at work, I'm like Ryan from "The Office" when he was a temp: I can clear my things out on a moment's notice*. It seems that literally all of my co-workers are involved in a cubicle decorating contest. Today two of them asked me if I wouldn't mind if they strung some tinsel around my cube so it would be flush with the others and I agreed. I don't want to go all out, but I don't want to be the office Grinch, either, so I bought something tonight: the Charlie Brown Christmas tree and a baby blue security blanket to give it a little love. I'm not gunning for the decorating prize (Christmas is too commercial!), but I don't mind jazzing my workspace up a bit.

On a somewhat related note, although my buddy Chad and I exchange combined birthday/Christmas gifts later on in December, he gave me one early: this super cool Linus ornament. Press its button and he recites the Christmas story while a light shines on him. I think it's a bit heavy for my new tree, though.

*Personal items in my cube: 2008 "The Office" wall calendar, Squishee cup, a couple of issues of "Entertainment Weekly", a pack of gum, and the Emo Emu picture. That is all.

Good news, everyone

It's been over four years, but "Futurama" is back! Today sees the release of the show's first straight-to-DVD movie Bender's Big Score (to be followed later by The Beast with a Billion Backs, Bender's Game, and The Wild Green Yonder). These movies will then be chopped up and aired as "new" episodes on Comedy Central sometime in 2008.

For now I'm just happy that it's back and that the DVD includes a full-length episode of "Everybody Loves Hypnotoad." I'm walking on sunshine!

Crush of the Week: Mary Elizabeth Winstead

This week's Crush is actress Mary Elizabeth Winstead, who is in a couple of recent-to-DVD movies: Quentin Tarantino's Death Proof and the super kick-ass Live Free or Die Hard.


Santa Baby...

In the former, she was one of the only female leads who I did not want to see dead and in the latter she's John McClane's daughter. 'Nuff said. She's also been in a couple of other fun flicks, like Final Destination 3 and the underrated Sky High.

Gobble gobble

Turkey Day + the quiet storm = "Thanksgiving It To You"

Credit due: Thomas J. Kelly

Ask Professor Micah

It's been a while since I've run this feature, so why not do it again?

You know the drill: Go ahead. Ask me anything. I'll try to answer honestly and to the best of my knowledge*. My personal happenings/history, relationship advice, grooming tips, financial help, sports predictions, entertainment recommendations, Illuminati conspiracies - anything is fair game.

Just ask your questions in the comment section and I'll respond in kind. I'll keep answering in this post as long as it remains on the front page of the blog.

*No Googling.

Requiem for an anal retentive shopkeep

R.I.P. Dick "Mr. Whipple" Wilson, 1916-2007.



Hopefully, there's no one rudely mishandling personal hygiene products where you are now.

Sweet.

Sickening

Go Bucks and Spiders!

How I will be weathering the writers strike

The Writers Guild of America strike is winding up its second week and some of my favorite TV shows have run out of new episodes ("The Office"), others only have a handful left ("Heroes", "30 Rock"), and some have been shelved entiriely ("24"). So, as the airwaves get clogged with reruns and - *shudder* - reality shows, here is how I will occupy those precious hours:

• College football and basketball. This is a great time of the year for sports.


• Go through my ever-growing stack of unwatched DVDs. Seriously, there are lots.


• Delve into the bonus features of my DVDs.


• Listen to my archive of unevaluated albums. So much music, so little time...until now.


• Read more books. On deck: tomes from the Onion and Kevin Murphy (of MST3K).


• Scotch, scotch, scotch. I love scotch.


• Go through my collection of half-finished and unplayed video games. Lego Star Wars, I'm looking at you.


• Smoke more pipes. That Vermont maple cavendish is calling me.


• Wade through my endless stack of magazines that piles up each week.


• Get into new shows via On Demand ("Mad Men") or my backlog of downloads ("Pushing Daisies").


• Browse the new features and archives of some of my favorite e-zines (like the Onion, its A.V. Club, Stylus, and PopMatters)


• Plunge deeper into the job search.


• Program my own network though the miracle of home video technology. All "Arrested Development" and "Futurama", all the time.


• Comb the "Daily Show" archives for bits when the show was funny.


• Blog more. You know you want it.


• Read your blog. You know you want me to.


• Finish watching "Derek & Simon" and get hooked on other internet shows.


• Learn to cook some new dishes.


• Hit the gym. Gawk at hotties at said gym.


• Watch some Rifftrax, as everyone should.


• Facebook zombie fights.


• Sleep. Lots and lots of sleep.

Yeah, I think I can wait it out.

Bye Bye, Bonds

From the "No duh" file, Barry Bonds has been indicted on perjury charges regarding his "alleged"* steroid use.

Related Onion story: "Barry Bonds Took Steroids, Reports Everyone Who Has Ever Watched Baseball"

Well, duh.

*Yeah, right. (Hey, look! It's an asterisk!)

Office chatter

Tonight's episode of "The Office": "The Deposition"

Michael faces a dilemma when Jan decides to sue Dunder Mifflin and he is deposed as a witness.

Due to the WGA strike, this may be the season finale.

MW Bonus "30 Rock" Synopsis: "Somebody to Love"

Jack falls for his complete opposite, a Democratic congresswoman from Vermont.

Discuss.

Sunny day

Tonight's season finale of "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia": "The Gang Dances Their Asses Off"

Charlie inadvertently puts Paddy's up as the grand prize in a dance marathon. The gang must then win the competition to keep the bar.

Discuss.

Bonus Crush of the Week: Kaitlin Olson

This week's Bonus Crush is actress Kaitlin Olson, probably best known for playing Sweet Dee on "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" (or Larry David's sister-in-law on "Curb Your Enthusiasm").



She is what George Costanza would call a "two-face" (unlike that "Seinfeld" episode, though, Olson ranges from "cute" to "plain", not "ugly"), but I think that she looks good in this picture.

Fun fact: she is six days older than me.

Crush of the Week: Elizabeth Banks

This week's Crush is actress Elizabeth Banks. Looking at her filmography, she's been in a bunch of my favorites: Wet Hot American Summer, the Spider-Man movies, "Stella", The 40 Year Old Virgin, Catch Me If You Can, and "Scrubs". Yes, she does comedy well.



Fun facts: she converted to Judaism for her husband and graduated from Penn State.

Bonus pic:



Her appearence in Fred Claus brought to light a new fetish of mine: women in sexy Santa outfits. Ho, ho, ho, indeed.

My kid could paint that

My niece drew my portrait* the other day. It's so photorealistic that it's scary.

*Bunch of lines under my "nose" = my beard

Pop quiz, hotshot

Over the weekend I took Rolling Stone's Almost Impossible Rock & Roll Quiz and, yes, as the title implies, I could see it being extremely difficult for the layman. But I am not such a person. See, I'm the kind of guy that highlights selections of the Rock Snob's Dictionary while listening to my Belgian import flexi disc of Big Star's Radio City. That said, I found it kind of tough and got a score of 42. Beat that, chumps.

Micah World Top 25

Here they are, the top 25 songs burning up my iPod (as of 11.12.07):

1. "Lights On" - The Pierces
2. "Everysong" - Lloyd Cole
3. "I Knew You Before" - Dustin Kensrue
4. "Love You" - Jack Ingram
5. "A Postcard to Nina" - Jens Lekman
6. "Grace Kelly" - Mika
7. "Gospel" - The National
8. "Hope For Us All" - Nick Lowe
9. "Song Without a Chorus" - Butch Walker
10. "For the Girl" - The Fratellis
11. "Paris 2004" - Peter Bjorn and John
12. "Hey Eugene" - Pink Martini
13. "Paul Shapes" - The Pipettes
14. "St. Augustine" - Band of Horses
15. "You Picked Me" - A Fine Frenzy
16. "Flathead" - The Fratellis
17. "Nothing Better" - The Postal Service
18. "P Control" - Prince
19. "Meet Me at the Fair" - The Push Stars
20. "Kiss Me" - Sixpence None the Richer
21. "Elephant Stone" - The Stone Roses
22. "Summer's Gone" - Aberfeldy
23. "Sad Bomber" - Asylum Street Spankers
24. "Parentheses" - The Blow
25. "Fists Up" - The Blow

Lots of changes since the last chart. Expect to see copious amounts of Christmas music on the next one.

Please wish for these celebs to spectacularly flame out (or die) within the next three weeks

So, I joined blog buddy panthergirl's league in this fantasy celebrity game, which started yesterday. Here is my roster (and their current point totals):



The mere fact that I didn't get Britney in the draft means that I have an uphill battle ahead of me.

Office chatter

Tonight's episode of "The Office": "Survivor Man"

After Ryan excludes Michael from a corporate wilderness retreat, Michael heads into the woods for his own survival adventure with nothing but the suit on his back. Back at work, Jim tries to revolutionize the office birthday party.

Due to the WGA strike, this is the second to last new episode for the time being. Per Jenna Fischer's MySpace blog:

By now you may have heard that The Office has shut down production. This is true. They cleaned out my trailer and just delivered me 3 boxes of my stuff. It is pretty surreal. We cannot produce new episodes of The Office until the Writer's Guild strike is over.

...

Oh...there are only 2 unaired original episodes of The Office left. And, I'm sad to say the one we were getting ready to shoot was going to be the funniest of the year. I'm sure of it. They've been pitching this particular story idea for over 2 years...it involves Pam and Jim being in Michael's home but that's all I'll say. I hope we get to shoot it soon. Let's all stay strong and hope that the strike can end soon.

MW Bonus "30 Rock" Synopsis: With GE 'going green,' Jack must come up with an idea for a green mascot -- a Phillies-esque looking character named Greenzo. But when Greenzo's preaching becomes overly obnoxious at The Girlie Show, Liz gets fed up with the whole idea. Meanwhile, Kenneth plans his annual party, where Liz is the only one to ever show up, and Tracy spreads rumors to hype-up Kenneth's party but they soon get out of hand.

Discuss.

Sunny day

Tonight's episode of "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia": "Bums: Making a Mess All Over the City"

To rid their neighborhood of undesirables, Mac and Dee become vigilantes, and Frank and Dennis impersonate police officers. They enjoy the feeling of power this gives them...perhaps too much.

Discuss.

Crush of the Week: Jennifer Love Hewitt

This week's Crush is actress Jennifer Love Hewitt.


Party of yum.

Just because.

Who are the ad wizards who came up with these?

Yeah, posting YouTube clips just screams "SHAMELESS FILLER!" And it is. But here are a couple of terrible commercials currently in rotation around these parts:



A Step in Time chimney cleaners - Chim Chim Cher-ee! Pure fromage.



Auto Connection car dealers - If you can believe it, I've only seen this played during daytime TV. Shocking, I know.

The goose is getting fat

So this weekend I broke out the Christmas music - mainly the album put out by Barenaked Ladies a few years ago - and also started downloading some holiday tunes. A little early, you say? Actually, I'm a week or so later than usual. See, some of us compile a Christmas CD each year and that takes time. You want one, punk? Huh? Well, then, quit your bitchin'. Happy Holidays!

Thank you, Radiohead!

Now, I'm not really much of a Radiohead fan, but I really admire their acknowledging that the music industry just doesn't get it and having the fans set their own pricing for the band's new album. Whether or not this is just a passing gimmick or the new standard, the Radiohead influence is spreading:

• Spoken word artist/poet/MC (?) Saul Williams is letting listeners name their own prices for his new album The Inevitable Rise and Liberation of Niggy Tardust. Normally, I wouldn't give this release much of a thought, but Trent Reznor produced it and, judging by the quick samples that I've heard, his fingerprints are all over it. Too bad an instrumental version wasn't released.


• Paste magazine is letting people judge what they pay for a one year subscription (there is a $1 minimum). I had a free subscription to some magazine affiliated with Tower Records a year or so ago, but that mag folded and a few issues of Paste were sent to me for the remainder of the sub. It's pretty good and every issue comes with a compilation CD (and sometimes a DVD). I figured that was worth $3, so they got my money.

So, thank you, Radiohead. This new pricing model is the best thing you've produced since "Creep" (or maybe "Karma Police").

Requiem for Sir Lancelot

R.I.P. Robert Goulet, 1933-2007.



"Vera said that?"

Office chatter

Tonight's episode of "The Office": "Branch Wars"

When Karen tries to woo Stanley away from Scranton, Michael fights back.

Also, news came out that NBC is developing a spin-off of "The Office".

Discuss.

Sunny day

Tonight's episode of "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia": "The Gang Gets Whacked"

In an hour long episode a misunderstanding with the mob over a set of speakers and a stash of cocaine prompts Dennis to hire himself out as a male escort. It's that, or he and the rest of the gang will get whacked.

Discuss.